She is still on a back of my mind
The girl I went out yesterday with, invited me today again for a date. I went to the same place we used to go with HER, it was kind of troubling. We had a nice dinner and good chat, no kiss. The girl seem to be really into me, but I don’t know if I am.
Then came home and chatted online with bunch of people, some kinky conversations as well. But now when I am laying down in bed, the thoughts of her creep in. I mean it was a good weekend, but just so many things remind me of her. I am starting to thing that perhaps dating right now is not a good idea. Perhaps I need to be lonely for quite some time to starve to be with someone else.
Perhaps there is not enough physical attraction to that girl that I went out with tonight, to make me forget her. She is a really nice girl, smart, beautiful eyes and ambitious attitude, yet I long for someone older than me with smokes out hands, a belly and someone that never wanted to make it with me for real. This is how crazy and twisted my mind is. I am going through changes, this is my new life – and I don’t know if I like it. I guess I need to enjoy this time as sooner or later I am going to get married and the life as I know it, will fucking stop. These changes don’t make me happy.
